I had my teeth cleaned.
My disheartened hygienist complains, "You never have any plaque." *waaaah*
Oh, lookie me, I'm a disappointment in the plaque department -- which may also mean my arteries might be a disappointment in the plaque department (The Plaque Department?? 17th floor!) which might also mean that worrying about dying of heart disease, (instead of sixty three other possible deadly diseases I could die of) based on ovary removal during a radical hysterectomy for stage 3C uterine cancer that I probably got from eating a hotdog when I was three years old, oh, THAT, and being such an angry, negative person -- could be put off that much longer.
I asked the hygienist what I could do to make my teeth more of a challenge for her? She had no response. I hate to have boring, un-plaqued teeth when I'm paying the same price that a disgusting, toothbrushless, plaque-covered, booze-breathed, multi-toof-missin hobo with no dental insurance has to pay. Why am I the one gypped out of the full dental cleaning torment, blood, gum pain, floss flyin, -- not to mention the mandatory lecture on flossing -- well, ARE YOU FLOSSING EVERY DAY? -- because at my age, I take extra good care of the three teeth that remain in my mouth? Taking care of my teefs hardly take much time at all.
Is it too much to be asked to be treated like everyone else in this world?
6 comments:
I think the solution to your hygiene dilemma is to find a good looking male hygienist :-)
I checked out the links you left at Lee's, both of them were very entertaining, in completely different ways. :-) Your story is mesmerizing, and I love how you have worked so hard for your health, including your teef.
You still have three teef? At your age?
Good for you!
And I'm sure there has to be a correlation between the lack of plaque (that has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?)
in your teefs and your blood stream... really. So you only have to worry about the other 63 possibilities!
PS...Can you please remove that photo from this post? I almost lost my dinner. (such a weak stomach I have....) I'm sure cousin Harry would be upset to know you used him as an example....
LOL at the bag lady :)
I have baaaaad teeth. brush floss like a maniac and go every three months for a cleaning as well.
genetics are a b*tch sometimes.
I never thought about the two kind of plaques possibly being related! I hope so, because while I have plenty of other dental issues, I always impress the hygienist with my lack of plaque.
I'm already in awe of your writing, now I have to be jealous of your plaqueless teeth too?
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