Strange Bedfellows

This year due to all of the rain, my gardening consists of taking the huge pair of lopping shears across the road from my house and chopping off branches, broom and scrub. Last night it was pouring down rain. I got a bee in my bonnet to get over there wearing my bright (too large) orange rain coat and start the lopping process on the branches that were drooping over the road - heavy with rain. 


What makes my gardening behavior legal is the county used to do this work when they had money, keeping trees and branches off the road. Though I'd really rather do this work myself because when I do the work, it gets done without ten county employees standing around scratching themselves while leaning sideways on a shovel, talking about last night's game. Let's face it. I'm cheap labor plus I don't need a shovel just to stay vertical.


This morning upon climbing out of bed, I noticed a strange object on the carpet right next to the bed. I bent down to pick it up, realizing the object felt kinda armor-ish, I tossed it quickly onto my dresser. Turns out it was a scorpion body. To my relief it was dead. I probably rolled over on it in the middle of the night and crushed it under my bones, knocking it off the bed.


I didn't think too much of it, we had a scorpion in the clothes once. I wanted to photograph it. I put the scorpion in a biodegradable plastic-type container made of cornstarch. I put the container in my dog toy bag (always carry a dog toy bag now). 


Arriving at work, I told my sister about gardening and the run-in with the scorpion carcass - relieved I wasn't stung because if it had stung me - OW.


I took the container out of my bag to take a picture and the scorpion waved to me. When I die, I'm hoping someone will put my carcass in a biodegradable container made out of cornstarch so I can come back to life too.