Down on Boone's Farm

I am a dud.
I admit it. I've been ancestoring still and I am addicted, I suppose, to the aged and aging. And why not? I'll be there any second, I mean, now.


As I occasionally have been reporting on facebook to anyone who'll listen, I found out I am related to the famed woodsman (woodsperson?) Daniel Boone. He is my 6th great grandfather. So now I've decided to be addicted to Daniel Boone for awhile. Through Ancestory.com I've met (online) several relatives, approximately 6 of them so far.


I also discovered that the long-er ago your death -- the more people there are out there looking for you. In the case of my grandpa, I'm one of the 3 people who care yet in the case of Daniel Boone, there are some several hundred kinfolk, kinnin' 'round for information. Or in the case of just about anyone that old and dead, they have flocks of followers. What this means is if you die any time soon, you'll have a long wait before you become famous enough to be among the long sought after dead.


Bella is still wonderful and Bradley is still cute and funny as heck. Hannah is busy with kindergarten and turning kind of snooty but that's to be expected. I never grew out of snoot.


One other thing is, with lymphedema, I have to wear wide width shoes which are somewhat difficult to find. I mean, I haven't hit the transvestite shoe stores yet though I'm not the type of gal who will wear stiletto heels with puffy lymphedema-ed feet looking like Bridgeford dough rising up out of the pan, sticking out of the sides of my shoes. I try to find regular (I-like-to-think) looking, athletic-type, casual shoes. The shoes all look like tickytacky and they all look just the same. And once I had a blind date with a guy who told me at the end of the date that he had a foot fetish and I never went out with him after that. Then I told him I had cancer so he'd leave me alone. Then I got cancer. Word to the wise.


The other day Bella was playing with a pair of my shoes (as if I have oodles of shoes to choose). And I snatched them away from her. I gave them a quick once-over, tossing them in the trash and with that toss went my most recently purchased pair of shoes because all my shoes look alike (and I might as well have let her chew on them because at least one of use would have gotten some use out of them). I need new eyeballs or at least new vision. Well, actually, what I need now is a new pair of shoes.

My most recent cute Bradly pic.

Most recent scowls (both SOLD!)

Bella wondering where those two motorhomes (aka my shoes) went?

Week Notes

On Friday I got a fb note from Jesse about meeting him for lunch on Saturday. When Saturday came and our time to meet passed, I decided not to sit around, waiting. I had done some shopping early in the day, then gone home to knit. I finished (almost!) two projects over this weekend. Worked on a lot of beading. Went to the bead store without my glasses so I could only buy BIG BEADS or at least I hope that's what I bought!


I hate to forget my glasses.


Joanne rescued me for lunch, and as it turned out, dinner too. We decided to walk from her place to downtown Capitola and take a chance on the new(ish) Britannia Arms because they have outside seating; the dogs can hang out with the humans. I'm glad we didn't make it all the way to the village after reading the Yelp reviews. Ugh. The weather was very hot and I was projecting all sorts of neuroses on Bella. Her limping, sweating, short-legged, panting and me with no camera water. We turned around and walked back to J's house. We decided to go to Zameen where they have an outside patio and although I don't ask, I assume mostly locals hang out since the restaurant isn't near the ocean, though the outside patio on a sunny day is wonderful. We split a salad with a few shrimp and drank wine. I got stung by a bee and discovered I'm not allergic. People are cheerful -- they greet you and we converse with random strangers. These people also want to talk about corgis - a lot. One woman walked by from a distance and shouted, "Oh, how cute!" And I said, "Thank you!" She said, "And the dog too!" ;-)


Bella and I got home just in time to catch the cat sidling up to her litter box, getting ready for the big job of the day. Bella, anxiously awaiting the outcome (as it were) as if the cat were serving THAT. DAY. ONLY. in a cone instead of the daily Swedish meatball-effect, cat turds bedecked throughout with scented gravel only because I haven't switched the cat litter over to white rice yet. Rice is probably less expensive than litter now. Watching Bella eyeball the cat reminded me of standing in line at a Foster's Freeze only I would have, in a previous life, taken my cone double-dipped.

Sunday, we went to Trader Joe's, then took a walk and met up with Bella's cousin, Cowgirl. Cowgirl may have finally earned that name with that belly of hers while Bella just looks puzzled though I think her puzzled look may be me projecting again.

Cancer Support Groups - Celebrate Life Together

David Haas is a cancer survivor and awareness program advocate at the Mesothelioma Cancer Alliance. David often blogs about programs and campaigns underway at the Mesothelioma Cancer Alliance while creating relationships with similar organizations. Being that I have come this far (nearly 5 years out from my original cancer diagnosis), I suppose I might be considered a similar organization. Below is a guest post from Mr. Haas for your enjoyment.

Hannah has been my support

Cancer support groups inspire survivors to find healthy ways to cope with their disease. The resources, advice, and personal stories survivors share with each other are both practical and encouraging. One study of breast cancer patients who attended weekly support groups showed significant improvement in survival time. This is just as likely for those with thyroid cancer, mesothelioma, skin malignancies, and other forms of cancer. Even if life expectancy does not improve, quality of life surely does.

Many cancer patients find it hard to talk about what is happening to them. It may be awkward, uncomfortable, or painful to talk about the disease, even to family and friends. Talking to doctors and nurses can be just as hard. It may seem easier to ignore the issue, but talking can help. While some cancers are curable and most are treatable, almost all survivors face an emotional crisis. Cancer can be the scariest challenge of someone’s life. Talking with others who are going through the same thing reminds survivors that they are not alone.

There is not a “right” or “wrong” to deal with cancer. Each person copes in his or her own way. But talking about it with other survivors, or writing about it in journals or blogs, is therapeutic. Knowing that other people are listening helps survivor’s better cope with the challenges they face.

Some people find it hard to reach out to others, especially if they think they have nothing to give in return. Many cancer survivors are surprised to discover how many people want to support them. Partners, families, and friends can be disappointing sources of support because they are dealing with their own emotions. Most healthcare communities and some churches have support groups, provided by people who simply enjoy helping others. Hospice teams offer support during the last months of life.

An online group like the American Cancer Society “Cancer Survivors Network” is a valuable resource for cancer survivors. They celebrate life together by supporting each other and telling their stories. Discussion boards are a good place to meet other survivors and build friendships. Internet chat and instant messaging allow for real-time conversations. And cancer support blogs offer useful information and insight.

Cancer patients face similar fears and uncertainties. Support groups are important whether someone has treatable breast cancer, an unfavorable pancreatic cancer prognosis, or a short mesothelioma life expectancy and prognosis. Talking about cancer with people who understand is priceless. Support networks give survivors a sense of belonging and a safe place to vent. Group involvement is known to reduce stress and improve health, for a better quality of life. And that is something every cancer survivor wants and needs.  Other online resources can be located at:

Inspire.com

Caring Bridge

By: David Haas

Ground Zero Redux

While many people (at least in the media) seem to be reflecting on 9/11 over this weekend, I wanted to write about my own 9/11/01. 


Greg was in the process of dying from colon cancer. He had been an avid news freak, and when 9/11 occurred, I had to turn off the radio and the television because being heavily medicated with morphine, and other assorted painkillers, Greg was stressing out. He wanted to know what was happening; he heard us quietly whispering.  


The morphine caused some pretty crazy hallucinations. Greg had signed with hospice on August 1st, 2001, and by 9/11, 2001, he was extremely anxious about dying, what was happening to his body and what was left of life. He occasionally talked to ghosts -- I heard him talking. He had a full blown conversation with Louie Dorcich; Louie had recently died earlier in the spring. Greg begged me to take him home to California yet that's where we lived. He kept tugging, pleading for me to take him home. 

On September 11 th, 2001, like everyone else I heard the shocking news about the Pentagon, the World Trade Center, and flight 93, though I could not pay much attention to that news like so many people. In my house we had lost contact with the world. We were dealing with our own disaster. We didn't have the time or strength to deal with the latest horrific public disaster.

When you receive a cancer diagnosis -- something attacks your body from out of nowhere, a plane flies through your building - so to speak. You automatically assume that you're going to die, and the world has the nerve to keep on going as if you didn't exist, didn't matter. People still have babies, get married, divorce, people die, and planes fly through buildings. For the majority of us there's no media attention. No fanfare. You are pretty much on your own, sort of like those folks at the top of the World Trade Center right before the towers fell. 

Greg sleeping with our dog - 41 days before his "tower collapsed."

(Post originally published here on Sept 11, 2008)

The Days of Yore

Photo taken from the top by me

I visited the World Trade Center once. It was the late 90s. I had gone to NYC with my son. His girlfriend at the time was going to NYU - she's a lawyer now - beware!. All they wanted to do at that time was to get stoned and have sex. So I was on my own. I was afraid of heights but I wasn't going to give up the opportunity to visit the WTC because of my fear. I kept thinking that I'd never have this opportunity again in my lifetime. I was right  -- as usual.

View taken from near the bottom. (not a good photo)

Rogue's True Identity

While Rogue anxiously awaits her father's return from working the night shift at the Hong Sing Chinese Takeaway, her sister smiles deviously as if she knows something she can never reveal.

Tender at the Bone

Last night both Eric and his gf were at the top of the driveway trying to pick up messages on their cell phones. No signal.

I told Eric not to bother with his voicemail because his only one voicemail was from me. The voicemail was about a dead (as opposed to a live) deer leg he had discovered --- that I had deposited in the trash. Don't worry - the deer leg was right on top of the other garbage. Eric didn't have to dig far. Eric and I were having a discussion about whether the deer leg should be considered organic or meat. 

Meat goes in the trash. Organic goes in recycle.

Do the math.

Bella (aka meat) rolling in something gross and smelly on the forest floor